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Brandi Oldham

Why Is It So Hard To Quit?

Updated: Jul 28

I don't know if you have been watching the Olympics, but I couldn't help but notice a trend in the commercials. Everyone is hiring or posting about career shifts!


I think it's safe to say that in the past year we have all done some reevaluating of our priorities. The pandemic has forced the world to change and with it many of us have had a change in our career goals. I know I have experienced this shift with clients, but based on what I am seeing on commercials the trend is much broader. Many of us know that a job is not the right fit fairly early on in our career journey, but despite the feeling we often stay past the expiration date.


Why is it so hard to quit a job we know isn't a good fit?


The reality is we all accept job offers with an immense amount of hope. We dream of learning new skills, being challenged, having a team that is supportive, and finding a place where we can be an expert. The day we accept that new job offer we envision a new life. That dream and that vision are hard to let go. Even if the team is unsupportive, the job is stagnant, and the work environment causes friction with our lives outside of work we still hope that things will turn around. We want so badly for our jobs to be the dream we hoped they would be.


Now I would be naive to think this is the only reason people stay in jobs that they know aren't a good fit. There are often other aspects that drive our decision. Some of us are the sole providers for our families, our jobs may be so demanding that we don't have time to research a new opportunity, we may be fearful of making the wrong choice, or we are afraid of rejection. There are a multitude of reasons why we choose not to quit, some based in fact and some in fear. Those objections have to be worked through as well, but they can only be worked through once we let go of the dream we had for our current role.


In order for us to move forward with our careers we have to grieve our past expectations.


If you know your job is not serving you well, why are you staying? Have you allowed yourself the space to let go of the idea of what you wanted your job to be and really look at what it is? Choosing to quit a job is never an easy decision, but in order to make room for a new dream we have to grieve the loss of the old one.


If you need help processing these thoughts please reach out to a career coach. We would be happy to help!

 

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